You do not need me to tell you that marriage is one of life’s most extraordinary milestones. It’s a moment where two people choose each other, fully and completely, in front of everyone they love. However, there is a sad reality for trans people I need to tell you. When you’re transgender, you may feel like you are carrying a burden all by yourself. It’s more common than you think. There’s something really moving about standing in a space that celebrates love. A place where people see and accept you as you are. Wedding officiants from OKC say that you should be full of joy during such moments.
But how can I replace my anxiety with joy, you ask? Well, that’s where the experience of Dr. Tinsley Taylor Keefe comes in. Her experience as a trans marital counselor gave her important insight that she uses to help trans couples. Continue reading to learn some helpful tips from the doctor. I hope this piece will help you understand how to get rid of the fear you experience during wedding events.
Remember, It’s Your Life
I know it is very simple, and maybe even cliché, but this first piece of advice might be the single most liberating thing. Always remind yourself that your life is yours. So is your identity. And no one else’s opinion gets to define your experience, not at a wedding, and not anywhere else. The truth is, people will always have opinions about you. That’s never going to change. What can change is how much value you give to them.
The stranger across the reception hall who looks at you funnily? Believe me, they will forget about it by the time they finish their appetizer. So, whenever you feel down, just remember that you didn’t come here for them. Tinsley Keefe says you should be really proud of authenticity because it truly takes courage. I completely agree because most people try to blend in instead of being the most genuine version of themselves. Making this mindset switch will ensure you arrive at any wedding event in Edmond, OK, brimming with confidence.
You Deserve To Enjoy As Much As Anyone
Weddings are, at their core, joyful gatherings filled with dancing, laughter, good food, and tears. So, when I see people feeling uncomfortable during such occasions, it breaks my heart. So many transgender guests and couples feel like they are climbing a mountain at these events. Whenever I speak to trans marital counselors from OKC, they tell me this problem is more common than you’d think. People feel like it’s easier to hover near the edges of the room, to keep a low profile. They would rather stay in their head rather than get on the dance floor. Does it feel safe? Yes. But is it joyous? Absolutely not.
Tinsley Ariana Taylor Keefe encourages transgender people to lean into the joy rather than stand in the corner. Accept the compliments graciously. Try having a conversation with someone new. Better yet, get out on the dance floor, even if you feel a little awkward at first. Believe me, everyone does. Here’s a quick and effective mindset shift I would like you to try. Don’t think of fun as something you have to earn for portraying a perfect version of yourself. Instead, think of it as something you deserve, no matter what others might be saying about you.
Allow Yourself To Feel
Of all the advice Tinsley shares, this one resonates with me the deepest. Weddings are not the time or the place to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. I like to think of them as a sacred pause that drowns out the noise of everyday life. You could even say that it is a moment dedicated specifically to love and connection. So, whatever you are feeling while you are on the way to the wedding venue can wait until after the ceremony. Yes, it is that simple. Just put things on hold and allow yourself to feel every small moment.
Will those negative feelings magically disappear? Chances are that they won’t. However, dealing with them during a wedding ceremony simply does not make sense. Once you start observing what your mind is saying without judgment, you are in control. So, whenever your mind tries to remind you of something negative, don’t respond.
Try focusing on the present moment. You’re probably thinking I am starting to sound like a self-help book. I may be biased, but I believe you will benefit from this advice if you give it a shot. As a 2SLGBTQIA+ wedding minister from Tulsa, Oklahoma, Dr. Tinsley offers this advice to her clients, too. She says it works wonders once people start practicing it regularly.
It’s Time To Release Your Grip From Fear
Transgender wedding officiants in Oklahoma City know what it looks like when someone finally releases their grip on fear. Once you step fully into the moment, you will realize how breathtaking every moment of the wedding ceremony is. How do I know this? I have attended several trans-inclusive wedding events. Plus, I am also an avid follower of Dr. Tinsley. Her words of wisdom resonate with thousands, if not millions, of people.
I hope this article helped you understand how to enjoy yourself at weddings and other social events truly. And if you need help planning for one, we can help. Please send us an email or call us at (405) 696-6450, and our experienced event planners will be right there. Our team can help you find the best wedding videographer, organize a courthouse wedding, and more!
